


Marry me, maybe?

by xJane



Category: Druck | SKAM (Germany)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, David thinks he doesn't deserve Matteo, Future Fic, Jonas saves the day, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Matteo thinks he doesn't deserve David, Now actually involving a marriage proposal, What's new, or two, well I guess not really a marriage proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:15:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25772689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xJane/pseuds/xJane
Summary: “What is that?”, David asks, his confusion now complete.“Open it,” Jonas replies, sounding like he is trying to repress his anger.David does as instructed. He lifts the lid from the box and gasps.In the box, on a bed of velvet, sits a gold ring.“What – what the fuck?”, he chokes out. “What is this?”“Luigi gave me that, yesterday,” Jonas spits, his anger no longer repressed, the storm no longer brewing, but now blowing into David at full force, and he bends backwards before it, powerless.“He was going to ask you to marry him.”***Or, the one in which Jonas confronts David about not wanting to marry Matteo.
Relationships: Matteo Florenzi/David Schreibner
Comments: 41
Kudos: 110





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't know I was gonna write Druck fiction until it happened!
> 
> Hope you'll enjoy! 
> 
> Should I do a second part? I have an idea in my head, but haven't written it yet.
> 
> <3

It is a cold and dreary day and David has no idea why Jonas called him to meet up at the park. It is in and of itself rare that Jonas wants to talk to David alone, without Matteo or the boys. They get along swimmingly, but Jonas will never be David’s best friend the way he is Matteo’s, close as brothers. And David wouldn’t be David if he hadn’t arrived at the designated place a few minutes early, so he has time enough to wonder what the purpose of this meeting is.

Right on the hour Jonas shows up, and David simply says “Na?” and balls his fist to bump Jonas’, their usual way of greeting – but Jonas just nods at him, curtly, ignoring David’s outstretched arm.

Shit.

Jonas’ face looks like the sky above: thunderstorm brewing.

David sits down on the bench, waiting for Jonas to start speaking.

Instead, Jonas hands him a small, square black box.

“What is that?”, David asks, his confusion now complete.

“Open it,” Jonas replies, sounding like he is trying to repress his anger.

David does as instructed. He lifts the lid from the box and gasps.

If you’d asked him at that moment what he expected to find, he wouldn’t have been able to give a coherent answer. However, he’d have sooner guessed it would be the key to the Reichstag, or a dinosaur skeleton, or any number of even more preposterous options, rather than this.

In the box, on a bed of velvet, sits a gold ring.

“What – what the fuck?”, he chokes out. “What is this?”

“Luigi gave me that, yesterday,” Jonas spits, his anger no longer repressed, the storm no longer brewing, but now blowing into David at full force, and he bends backwards before it, powerless.

“He was going to ask you to marry him.”

And David’s heart leaps in his chest at those words, elated, everything inside him jubilating at the idea of marrying his beautiful boyfriend, of Matteo promising him he’d stay forever, of having a golden band around his finger which Matteo would have put there, proving to the world how much David was loved by the kindest, gentlest, softest and most loving boy in Germany – no, in the world. He rejoices at the idea of calling Matteo husband, of sharing a name with Matteo, of standing in front of all their friends and family and showing them all exactly why they were meant to be. But then his brain catches up at the past tense Jonas used, and at the fact that Matteo is not here to offer David everything he ever dreamt of.

He looks up at Jonas, not understanding why Jonas would show him a glimpse of his deepest desire come true, only to snatch it away again rudely.

“Do you understand? Luigi, the boy who even on his best days walks around wondering why someone like you would even want to be with him, who worships the ground you walk on while constantly asking himself how he got lucky enough to be with the hottest and smartest and most talented and sexiest guy in all Berlin, who at least once a month tells me he feels bad about holding you back and how you would be so much better off with someone else, who tells _everybody_ he doesn’t deserve you, _that_ Luigi, David, scraped all his courage together and bought a ring to propose to you. Do you realize how important that is, David? Do you understand how brave that was?”

The tears have started pooling in David’s eyes during Jonas’ rant, because he does realize. Jonas is talking about his boyfriend after all, the boy he has been with for the past six years, the boy who supported him in everything he wanted to try, the boy who David loves more than life itself – the boy who keeps selling himself short, even though David knows he is larger than life.

What he doesn’t understand is why Matteo hasn’t asked him, why he has given Jonas the ring. Was he afraid David would say no? Did he somehow convince himself that David was not all in, that David would want to keep a door open, that there was even the slightest possibility David would ever want to run from Matteo?

“But… but why…”

“Why didn’t he? Because you told him you didn’t want him. And what I would like to know is how the fuck you think it’s okay to play with somebody’s feelings like that, to hurt the guy who loves you like he’s never loved anybody before? He cried, David, he sat there on my couch hunched together smaller than I’ve ever seen him, crying his eyes out, and all he said was how he couldn’t blame you, how he should never have expected you to stay with him forever. We’ve been friends for six years, David, but God, right now, I want to rip your throat. You hurt my best friend – my _brother_ – like nothing has ever hurt him before, and you just go on like it’s normal, like you don’t even give a shit.”

“But I never told him that!”, David yells, his anguish clear in his voice. “Jonas, what the fuck? There’s nothing I want more than to marry Matteo! Matteo is – he is _everything_ , Jonas, you know that. I would be nothing without Matteo.”

And it might sound melodramatic to some, but for David, it is the simple truth. Without Matteo, he wouldn’t ever have known love. He’d have been all alone, ever running, leaving behind the only person who’d been on his side since he became who he was, Laura, and leaving behind the only person he’d ever wanted to give all of himself to. He wouldn’t even have graduated high school, if Matteo hadn’t refused to give up on him. Matteo had been willing to fight for him, he’d been willing to risk everything by declaring his love for David, and he’d shown David he never needed to be alone ever again. And Matteo had not just given David Matteo, but he’d helped him find a whole family of people who supported him through anything – Jonas, Carlos and Abdi, all the girls, Hans and Linn and Victoria, Matteo’s mom. Without Matteo by his side, his top surgery wouldn’t have been the joyful moment it had been, even through all the pain and the long revalidation. If Matteo hadn’t taken a chance on him, he might have never found somebody to be himself with, fully and openly, body, heart, and soul. Without Matteo to believe in him, he would never have made it through university. If Matteo hadn’t encouraged him to go after his dreams, he’d still be that lonely scared boy Matteo pulled out of that abandoned pool all those years ago.

“That’s what we all thought,” Jonas cut into David’s thoughts, “but apparently, you said to him you’d never want to end up married to him. So either you are lying to my face, or he was, but considering he barely got the words out through the snot and the tears and his constant pleas for me not to be upset with you because you were right not to want to shackle yourself to him, I’m inclined to think it wasn’t him.”

Jonas is walking briskly up and down, his fists balled by his side, anger pulsating off him in shockwaves, his eyes never finding David, as if he is afraid he won’t be able to refrain himself from punching David if he looks at him.

David runs a shaky hand through his hair before he wipes over his eyes, the tears now slowly trickling over his cheeks. He halfway hopes Matteo and the boys will suddenly jump out from behind a tree, all of this just a horrible, painful, ill-conceived prank – anything but Matteo being sad, crying on Jonas’ shoulder, believing David doesn’t want him.

“Fuck, Jonas, I swear! When did I – I never said that! What did Matteo tell you? Please, Jonas, please,” he hears himself begging, but he’d do anything, he just needs the chance to make this right, whatever it is, “Please, just tell me exactly what Matteo thinks happened, I swear it must be a misunderstanding.”

Jonas seems to calm down a bit, tentatively looking at David, his hands relaxing slightly.

“Okay, well, he said it was a couple of months ago –”

“What?”, David interrupts sharply. “Months?”

Matteo – beautiful, strong, wonderful, loving Matteo – has been thinking for _months_ that David does not want to make their relationship official, has been walking around with a bleeding ache in his chest for months, and David hasn’t even noticed? God, he really is the worst boyfriend ever.

Jonas nods, as if he understands David’s shock and guilt.

“He said he didn’t want things to change between you guys, said he wanted to be with you as long as you wanted him, so he didn’t talk about it with anybody – but you know him, he’ll keep it all bottled up, festering inside him, and I guess yesterday he couldn’t handle it any longer and he found himself on my doorstep with that box in his hand.”

David wants to find Matteo right now, apologize to the most perfect boy he ever met - though an apology would never be enough.

“Anyway,” Jonas continues, and David honestly had forgotten he was there, “a couple of months ago, apparently, Luigi took you out to some restaurant, and he was gonna pop the question. But he claims he was nervous, and he couldn’t find the right moment, and while you guys were having dinner, you said ‘Oh my god, Teo, you should see the couple a few tables behind you. They are just ridiculous, so miserably married. I really hope you and I will never end up like that’ or something along those lines.”

And now David knows exactly what happened. Matteo and he didn’t dine out often, so when Matteo had taken him to a restaurant he’d read great reviews about, David had been so happy and so in love, glad to dress up a bit and show off his gorgeous boyfriend. He’d drank a glass or two of wine, and he’d been a bit buzzed, but mostly he’d been so love-drunk on Matteo, just sitting there, the two of them talking about everything and nothing, laughing out loud. He remembers touching Matteo’s hands, his fingers grazing over Matteo’s skin, watching how the candlelight reflected in Matteo’s deep blue eyes, getting a bit wet thinking about how he’d take Matteo home after dinner and undress him slowly and make him moan out David’s name as he would come, which was the most stunning sound on this earth if you asked David.

And he recollects being so fucking far gone for Matteo, and feeling so sorry for the husband and wife a few tables over, who’d been sitting across from each other for two hours now, not speaking a word towards each other, not even looking at each other, their eyes on their plates – so obviously not having anything in common, whatever love there might have ever been between them long disappeared – that he’d said something to Matteo, something smug and certain, how the two of them would never end up like that, thinking that his heart would stop beating before he’d ever stop loving Matteo with everything inside him.

He looks at Jonas now, his eyes wide open in horror when he realizes Matteo had interpreted his comment to mean David didn’t want to end up married to Matteo.

“God, Jonas – I didn’t – that’s not what I – that couple was obviously miserable – I didn’t want to end up like them, so loveless – not that I thought we would ever – it wasn’t about – I didn’t realize he thought – fuck. Fuck, Jonas. How could he ever think I wouldn’t want a lifetime with him?”

He looks at Jonas, aghast, not knowing where to go from here. Jonas nods, pensively.

“Okay, I think I see now. At first, I tried to tell Luigi that he must have misunderstood, because you love him, but when he said that, I assumed you really didn’t want to get married to him, and watching him being so heartbroken made me upset and angry at you for hurting him. And him insisting on defending you didn’t really help, either.”

“I don’t blame you, it makes me upset and angry at myself, too! How the fuck did I not see he was distraught and hurting?”

Jonas touches David’s shoulder gingerly.

“He didn’t want you to see. I scolded him, believe me, when I realized he’d been walking around with this for months. But he said he didn’t want to change things between you… He said if you didn’t want to take the next step he’d be happy with what he could get, with what he had. He said – he said something about pushing you when you were just getting together, and that you ran from him? He kept repeating he didn’t want to be too clingy and make you bolt.”

And that’s just – fuck. David _aches_ for Matteo, aches for the pain the boy carries with him after all those years, pain that David is responsible for.

“David…”, Jonas hesitates, but David needs to know everything, needs to know everything Matteo has suffered, so he can at least try to get absolution for his sins. He’d offer up his entire life in atonement, if necessary.

“He said – he said he kept this ring in his closet, but every day, he thought about taking it out and ask you anyway, even though he believed you didn’t want to, because he wants to marry you so badly. But then every day he hid it again, afraid of breaking something between the two of you, scared you will leave him when he is too clingy. That’s why he brought it to me… He said he couldn’t keep it, because one day he would break and ask you, and ruin everything between you and him. He begged me to get rid of it… before he would drive you away.”

“Oh, god, Jonas. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I didn’t know… I didn’t notice… I don’t deserve him, Jonas.”

Jonas chuckles a bit, and it sounds strange, after all the angry and agonizing words.

“I’ve known that for a long time, dude. But he deserves you, so I think it’s fine.”

And at that, David resolves to make things right. He vows to beg Matteo to forgive him, to marry him, even though he is the most undeserving boyfriend ever. He will fight for Matteo, who has been so brave and fought so many battles for David.

He stands up, and closes the black box, taking a last look at the beautiful promise that lies in it.

“Thanks, Jonas,” he says, quickly hugging the other guy tightly. “I gotta go, though. Wish me luck… and if all goes well, prepare to be Matteo’s best man soon.”

And he takes off, not waiting to hear Jonas’ answer, only one boy on his mind right now, as his heart beats in his throat and he clutches the ring in his hand.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You asked for it, so don't come complaining that out of the 3800 words of this, about 3000 (rough estimate) are just more angst. 
> 
> Just focus on the happy ending. 💙💙💙
> 
> Anyway, I hope you'll enjoy it.
> 
> <3

David runs all the way home, hurries upstairs, calls out Matteo’s name, before he remembers Matteo picked up a shift at the café tonight. He used to work there during his gap year and while he was at university, and occasionally he will still take a shift, whenever one of his former colleagues is ill or they need the extra hands. Come to think of it, it seems Matteo has been doing more and more shifts there recently, sometimes not even coming home first after his work at the small programming firm he joined after his graduation, going straight to the café. David realizes he has hardly even seen Matteo these past few weeks, other than early in the morning over a quick breakfast or late at night, when David wakes up to a tired Matteo falling into bed with him. Suddenly it makes all so much sense, Matteo bottling up his pain, not wanting to burden David with it, until he felt like he needed to get away from David for fear of letting it slip. He clutches at the small box in his hand, and tears well up again at the thought of Matteo dropping it off at Jonas’, because he was too afraid to just talk to David. And it’s on him, he thinks, angry at himself. He has failed to make Matteo see that there is nothing, _nothing_ , Matteo could ever say or do that would be a burden for David, that David wouldn’t want.

David feels his guilt and remorse grow tenfold, understanding Matteo has been feeling forced to flee their home because he didn’t want to risk hurting David. It is so typically Matteo, always taking on everybody else’s crosses, going out of his way to avoid bringing anybody pain, and David loves that about him – but not when it’s him that’s adding to Matteo’s load. Matteo and he are a team, they are supposed to share everything, good and bad – not bring each other down, even unknowingly.

Because really, that is the worst part. Matteo has been hurting, and David didn’t even know. He can try to reason it away – he was busy with a new film project and was working long hours, and then continuing often at home, and Matteo hid his feelings for David, to the point of making sure he’d be out of the house when David would be there – but the ugly truth remained that David had been so engrossed in himself that he failed to notice Matteo.

He'd better come up with a plan. He would need to pull out all the stops to woo Matteo, and then, maybe, if David was the luckiest bastard in the multiverse, Matteo would forgive him and agree to marry him – tomorrow, if David had anything to say about it.

But it seems David has used up all his luck that night in that pool, six years ago, when he got Matteo, because everything that can go wrong, does go wrong.

He wants to make Matteo dinner, even though he knows nothing will ever beat pasta alla Luigi, but he looks up a video for Thai green curry, one of Matteo’s favourites, and he does everything exactly as told, but of course, the chicken is burnt and crispy and the beans are soggy and wet and the sauce has the colour and the consistency of mud – and, if David is honest, the taste, too.

So when he has to scrap that plan, he tries to order take-out, but the Thai place is closed and the Indian place is so busy their earliest delivery is at ten-thirty and the sushi place keeps going to the answering machine and so David has to order pizza in the end, which feels so stupid because Matteo could make a far tastier pizza himself, and a romantic dinner feels a lot less romantic when the food is served in cardboard boxes.

So David runs out again, while he waits for the pizza delivery, to try to buy some of Matteo’s preferred Chianti, and candles, because maybe he can make up for the cardboard boxes if he makes it a romantic dinner by candlelight. He has to rush, to be back on time for the pizza guy, and it’s only when he starts unpacking the stuff he bought that he notices he has in fact gotten some Beaujolais, which isn’t even Italian at all. At least he got some beautiful red, long, narrow candles. But then he realizes they don’t own candlesticks, so the romantic dinner by candlelight will have to wait until another time, he thinks, as he angrily stuffs the candles in a drawer.

So now he has a romantic dinner of pizza. Fuck, he is hopeless. He should have booked a table at a fancy restaurant – only, he has no clue which places are supposed to be good. Matteo does know things like that. Matteo would have found a place with good food and a great atmosphere they both would love. He should have gotten Matteo’s favourite flowers – only he doesn’t even know what they are. He is sure Matteo knows David’s favourite flowers. He should have gotten Matteo a ring – a beautiful, expensive ring that would suit Matteo, that Matteo would be proud to wear and show to everybody. Instead, all he has is the small box with the ring Matteo bought for David, the ring David loves, because naturally Matteo knows exactly what type of ring to buy for his boyfriend. David really doesn’t deserve Matteo, and even more frustrated and upset now, he shoves the box next to the candles in the drawer.

And then it is seven forty, and Matteo’s shift ended ten minutes ago, and Matteo should be here by now, and the pizza is getting cold, and David looks at his sad attempt at wooing Matteo, and he just feels like he’s the biggest failure ever.

And then his phone pings, and it is Matteo, letting him know he’s leaving the café right now and will be home in a few minutes, adding an “I miss you” and a bunch of heart-eye emoji’s, because even when Matteo is hurt and sad and believes David doesn’t want to be with him for the rest of their lives, he is still kind and loving and wonderful and wouldn’t dream of making David worry even for a minute.

And David can’t take it any longer, he sinks down on the sofa and starts crying.

That is how Matteo finds him, and because Matteo is the perfect boyfriend David could never even hope to be, he drops his bag as soon as he sees David, and runs over faster than David has ever seen Matteo move.

“David? Baby, are you okay?”, Matteo asks, his voice full of worry, while he sits down and pulls David tightly against his chest, stroking his hair.

And David breaks – he doesn’t deserve Matteo taking care of him, _he_ should be taking care of Matteo, because _he_ is the one who caused Matteo pain.

And so he chokes, and he sobs out, “No, Matteo, don’t –” and Matteo lets go of David, immediately apologizing, and that is even worse, so David just shushes Matteo and crawls back into Matteo’s arms, crying like a baby because he will never be good enough for somebody as wonderful as Matteo. And when his tears finally subside a bit, he looks up at Matteo and asks him what David’s favourite flowers are, and Matteo is confused but answers nevertheless “Sunflowers”, and David starts crying again.

“I am so sorry, Matteo,” he sobs in between wails, “please, Matteo, please forgive me, I am so sorry, I don’t deserve you…”

Matteo interrupts, gentle but firm.

“Stop, David, that is not true and you know it. You are the best boyfriend I could ever wish for.”

“But I’m not!”, Davis whines, tears and snot all over his face, “I am the worst! I don’t even know your favourite flower!”

Matteo laughs, and Davis wants to get upset at that, at Matteo not understanding, at Matteo finding David’s manifest incapability of being a good boyfriend funny, but then again – it’s Matteo’s laugh, and that always makes David happy and calm, knowing Matteo is happy.

“I’m not sure I have a favourite flower, so it’s entirely understandable you don’t know it,” Matteo says, a chuckle still ringing through his words.

And that soothes David just the tiniest bit, that at least he’s not a total letdown.

“Will you tell me what’s going on?”, Matteo then prods, not pressuring David in any way, just wanting to help, to comfort David.

It threatens to overtake David again, Matteo’s eagerness to take away David’s pain, when David has failed Matteo on so many levels, but he knows that wailing around condemning himself for his past mistakes is not going to be of any help in getting Matteo to forgive him.

So he takes a deep breath, and wipes away the remnants of his pity party from his face, and tries to remember the goal.

“I have been the worst boyfriend, Matteo, and I am so sorry. I wanted to make up for it… I wanted to have a romantic dinner tonight to make it up to you, but everything went wrong…”

He gestures weakly to the table, where the pizza boxes are sitting sadly next to the stupid French wine.

“I messed up the food, so I had to order pizza, and I got the wrong wine, and we don’t have any candlesticks, and I’m just a complete failure, I’m so sorry…”

“Hey,” Matteo says, softly, his eyes full of love, “hey, you’re not a failure. Any dinner with you is romantic, because it’s with you. I love pizza, and we can see whether we like whatever wine you got. And what do you need candlesticks for?”

“Because I got candles… for a romantic dinner by candlelight… I can’t even do that right, Matteo.”

“You’re so sweet,” Matteo mumbles, and when David protests, he insists.

“You are, David. You got me food I don’t have to cook and wine to drink and you are telling me we can spend the whole evening together without either of us needing to work, and you’re upset about candlelight? David, you’ve just described the most perfect evening I could imagine.”

Matteo laughs, and David feels his heart swelling with bittersweet joy at that sound. This boy, this fucking angel, he has no idea how he ever managed to find him, but he sure as hell is never letting him go.

“Teo… you don’t understand. I need to make it up to you. I know a romantic dinner would not even be close to enough, but it would be a start. Because I am so, so, so fucking sorry, Matteo. I hurt you and I didn’t even know, I didn’t even see you were upset, I really am a horrible boyfriend, Teo, I know I am.”

Matteo sits very still, and looks at David with wide-open eyes.

“What are you talking about, David?”

“Fuck, I’m doing this all wrong… Matteo, I never meant to hurt you, okay? I swear I’d kill myself rather than hurt you. Please believe me. I didn’t mean any of it, Teo, it was just stupid, I should have never even – Teo?”

David stops talking when all the blood seems to drain from Matteo’s face, his eyes open even wider and the blue suddenly is no longer that of a summer sky but that of rain and cold and sadness and loneliness, and he grabs Matteo’s hand, but Matteo pulls back and swallows as he tries to speak.

“What – what are you talking about, David? What have you – what have you done? Are you saying… Did you… Is there… Did you meet…”

And David cries out, when he realizes what Matteo is thinking.

“God, no! Matteo, no! You are all I ever wanted and ever will want, Matteo!”

Matteo relaxes, his shoulders rolling back, his body slumping down next to David.

“Thank god,” he murmurs, barely audible, and maybe it wasn’t meant for David’s ears, but David hears it anyway.

“Teo… why would you even think that?”

Matteo glances up, a guilty look in his eyes.

“Just… you said it was meaningless… and you kept going on about being the worst boyfriend and hurting me, and I don’t know what you are talking about, because you never failed me. And then I just… I thought… The only thing you could ever do that would hurt me would be… if you stopped loving me…”

And David, who had planned this whole evening to proof to Matteo that he wants to be together forever, now has worried Matteo even more, and this is just another example of how he fails Matteo with every breath he takes, isn’t it?

He tries to hold Matteo’s hands again, and this time, Matteo allows it.

“I suck, Matteo. I completely and utterly suck. I am only hurting you even more. I can’t even apologize properly without causing you pain.”

Matteo shakes his head, and looks confused.

“But what are you trying to apologize for, then? You didn’t do anything…”

“But I said something. Months ago. When you took me to that restaurant.”

David sees understanding grow in Matteo’s eyes, and he opens his mouth to speak, but David is quicker.

“That is what I didn’t mean, Matteo. I didn’t mean to make you think I didn’t want to marry you, because I do, I fucking do, Teo, there’s nothing I want more in this world…”

Matteo gasps, and tries to get away from David, but David holds on for dear life.

“Fuck. Jonas shouldn’t have told you… He promised me…”

“Thank god he told me! How else would I be able to tell you it was all a misunderstanding? When I said we were never going to end up like them, I didn’t mean that I thought we shouldn’t get married! It wasn’t me telling you I don’t want to marry you. That couple was so miserable, they clearly didn’t love each other at all, and I just wanted to tell you how happy I was that the two of us would never become like them, just going through the motions without any feeling – we couldn’t become like them, because I’ll love you for the rest of my life, Teo.”

Matteo listens to him with rapt attention.

“So when you said you hurt me…”

“I meant that I gave you the impression I don’t want to take the next step… or that I made you think I’m not in this forever…”

Matteo nods, dumbstruck.

“And don’t tell me it didn’t hurt you, baby… You took on more shifts at the café to avoid me, didn’t you?”

Matteo nods again, guiltily.

“I’m not angry, baby… Just… Teo, why didn’t you talk to me? How could you ever think I wouldn’t want to know that you were hurt, even if I was the one hurting you? Don’t you know I would do anything to make you happy?”

“I just… I didn’t want to put pressure on you… I was afraid if I pushed you too hard, you’d want to get out…”

“Oh, Teo. Please don’t ever do that again, okay. Please, promise me you’ll never keep something like that from me ever again. You can never chase me away, baby, never. There is nothing, _nothing_ , Teo, you could do that would make me want to get out. I love you… I love you so much, baby, I want to spend the rest of my life with you… I’m so sorry I made you think that, made you afraid to talk to me. And I’m so sorry I didn’t pay enough attention. I swear I’ll do better, baby. I won’t ever take you for granted again.”

“It’s okay… I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you. I shouldn’t have avoided you these past few weeks.”

“You don’t have anything to apologize for, baby.”

“Neither do you, then. I should have known better than to doubt you, doubt us…”

David pulls Matteo into a tight hug, and it feels so wonderful, to know they are on the same page again, that there is no more lingering uncertainty and suffering between them.

“Shhh. Let’s just promise we’ll never do this to each other again, okay? We’ll come to each other in the future when something is bothering us.”

And Matteo promises him they will do that, and they just sit, staring at each other, drinking each other in.

“And for the record, Teo: I’m gonna marry you. I want the world to know you are mine.”

“Oh, really?”, Matteo giggles. “You’re gonna marry me? Usually, it’s customary to ask, instead of inform.”

David laughs, and he wants to kiss Matteo so badly, but he also wants Matteo to understand he’s serious.

“Well, I just informed you. So you better be ready for a proposal, Teo. I want to marry you, and if I had a ring, I’d ask you right now, but I don’t, and you deserve one. You deserve everything. You deserve the world, the sun and the moon and all the stars. You deserve so much better than me, but I have you and I don’t intend to let you go.”

“I don’t want you to let me go. I want you to hold on to me. I want to be with you for as long as you’ll have me.”

“Forever, then,” David whispers, and then, because he can’t possibly hold on one second longer, he kisses Matteo, and it feels like their first kiss all over again, and yet it doesn’t, because there is now so much more between them, love and trust and honesty and healing and a deep feeling of belonging.

Matteo breaks the kiss all too soon, and David tries to chase his lips, but Matteo sits up and David looks at him.

“So…”, Matteo starts, and then hesitates.

“What, baby? No more holding back. No more secrets.”

“So you would not be opposed to me asking you to marry me, then?”

David laughs, freely and brightly.

“God, no. I’d say yes before you finished the question.”

Matteo laughs too, and pecks David on the lips, hard, before he jumps up and starts going in the direction of the bedroom, but he stops abruptly and slaps his palm to his face.

“Ah, fuck! I can’t! I don’t have –”

He interrupts himself, and looks at David sheepishly. David feels the joy seep through every pore, his veins filled with it, as he walks over to the chest of drawers.

“You don’t have this?”, he asks, his voice full of excitement and anticipation and hope.

Matteo looks a bit taken aback, when he sees the little box he knows so well in David’s hands, but then he smiles, and comes to stand in front of David, taking the box out of David’s fingers.

“Never mind,” he says, his voice deeper than usual, the emotion spilling from his tongue. And then he slowly sinks down on one knee, and he opens the box, and Davis gasps, because this is real, this is happening, this is not a dream.

“David Schreibner, will you –”

“Yes!”, he yells, falling onto his knees in front of Matteo, his hands on both sides of Matteo’s face, peppering kisses all over, punctuating each one with another yes.

And Matteo laughs, and leans into David, and complains he didn’t even get to ask the question.

“I told you I’d answer before you finished it,” David says, proudly, so in love with Matteo – his fiancé.

And then Matteo puts the ring on his finger, and David thinks he’ll explode with happiness and love, and he tells Matteo as much, and Matteo laughs again, and then they both laugh and they kiss and they cry a little bit, because it has been an emotional night and they know they need to talk some more and they need to make sure they are not holding anything back from each other ever again, but for now they are happy sitting on their knees on the floor, kissing, both thumbing the gold band on David’s hand, in front of their chest of drawers, with cold pizza on the table, and it’s the most romantic moment they both can imagine.

And much later, they eat cheese sandwiches because the pizza has gone completely gooey and inedible, and they drink French wine with them, and Matteo has stuck the expensive red candles in empty beer bottles and it is perfect somehow, because, as Matteo said, they were together.

And even later than that, they find themselves in their bed, and they are tired and a bit drained from all the tears they have shed, but they are also very much in love and they want to seal their engagement. So they take it slow, with careful fingers and exploring lips and their skin heats up where they touch each other and they pull the sheets over them to create their own little cocoon, just like the first time they did this, and they don’t have to speak because they both know that they have come so far together and they will go so much further in the future, because they chose each other in a pool, underwater, without oxygen, and they both know it was the best choice they ever made – even if they are both in awe of the fact that the perfect boy in their arms chose them back.

And when they later lie together, their legs entangled, they still don’t speak much. Matteo kisses the ring on David’s finger, and David can’t do anything but mumble how much he loves Matteo, as he realizes he is really engaged to Matteo, that he will really get to marry Matteo. He thinks about going to a jewelry shop tomorrow, and buy Matteo a ring, because it was true what he said, he wanted to ask Matteo, and put a ring on Matteo’s finger too.

And he thinks about marrying Matteo, as soon as possible, standing in front of him and promising him a lifetime of love and a forever home with each other, all their friends watching them become husbands.

And then he laughs, and Matteo looks at him curiously.

“Yeah, uhm, don’t worry about asking Jonas to be your best man.”

“What? Why not? Who else would I ask?”

David chuckles, and crawls up against Matteo’s naked body even more, though he didn’t think it would be possible to get any closer than he already was, sending a small prayer of thanks for Jonas, because without him, David would not be engaged to his gorgeous, wonderful, perfect Matteo right now.

“It’s just that I already asked for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course, I didn't go with my original idea at all (which was to have David propose with the ring Matteo bought)...
> 
> Please feel free to point out any errors.
> 
> And of course, leave me a comment if you'd like, I'd really appreciate your feedback!
> 
> <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So finally, here is the long awaited chapter three!
> 
> I struggled with it quite a bit, because it feels very different from the first two chapters (something about the vibes being off, maybe :) ?), but then I though, well, why not? The original story idea ended at the end of chapter two, maybe this is just another story in this same universe.
> 
> Either way, I hope you will enjoy it.
> 
> <3

Every time he sees the beautiful band on his finger, two conflicting feelings race through David’s body.

There is, of course, the incredible joy, the absolute elation he feels every time the glint of gold reminds him he is _engaged_ – as in, soon to be _married_ – to the softest boy ever.

It has been wonderful, being engaged. David has been showing off his ring to anybody and everybody who would listen - Laura, his parents, all of their friends, his coworkers, even the barista in the coffee shop he likes to go to. Laura has been recruited to be his best woman, Jonas to be Matteo’s best man, Carlos and Abdi swear up and down they will plan two different bachelor parties, and Kiki has been asking if she please please please can be the wedding planner.

But there is also some slight feeling of guilt eating away at David. He remembers how loved he felt when Matteo put the ring on his finger, and he still wants to do the same for Matteo. He wants to tell Matteo how much he loves him, how much he needs him, every single day. He wants to ask Matteo to be David’s for the rest of their lives. Even if they already said those things to each other, and they already promised to be together forever, David still wants to make the gesture. He wants to do this for Matteo, because Matteo deserves to be wooed. Matteo has always been the brave one in their relationship, the one who fought for them, and now David wants to do this one thing – even if Matteo did it first. He wants to go all out for Matteo at least once.

Not that Matteo is asking for it. In fact, Matteo seems to even have forgotten David’s promise. He smiles widely every time David calls him his fiancé, and David overheard him talking on the phone to his mom, telling her how excited and happy he was about their engagement. Lately, he has taken to play with David’s ring on his finger whenever he holds David’s hand – walking home together, or having a beer with the squad, or even just lying on the couch watching a movie. It warms David’s heart, this simple sign of Matteo’s contentment with this new development. Matteo isn’t asking for anything more.

But David wants to give Matteo more. He wants to give Matteo the world.

And okay, he’s not beyond admitting he has some selfish reasons to want his ring on Matteo’s finger, too. He wants every guy who even as much as thinks about hitting on Matteo to know Matteo is very, very taken.

It’s not like he hasn’t been thinking about it. It’s just that it needs to be absolutely perfect. Anything less won’t be good enough for Matteo. David still shudders when he recalls how everything had gone so horribly wrong, that evening when he had tried to win Matteo back – even though he had never really lost him. Either way, David feels that this time, there is no room for mistakes.

And that is why David has been in several jewelry shops now, staring at the engagement rings for hours, dithering over which one Matteo would like best. Is Matteo more a silver person or a gold person? Or would he like something different, like black titanium? Would Matteo like a sturdy, broad band, or an intricate, dainty sliver of metal? Simple or elaborately decorated? Gemstones or no gemstones? He keeps second-guessing himself, and so he still hasn’t bought anything.

And then there is the rest of the proposal. He wants to blow Matteo away. It has to be the most romantic proposal ever. He’s even asked the girls for ideas, but nothing feels right. A hot air balloon ride? Matteo would grumble about being cold high up in the sky, for sure. Hiding the ring in a fancy dessert? With David’s luck, Matteo would start dissecting the dessert so he could recreate it at home, instead of paying attention to the ring. A message on the big screen at a sports match? They don’t even like any sport that much, so taking Matteo to a match would be silly in the first place.

Kiki, obviously eager to start the wedding planning, has been sending him articles and links almost daily lately – wintery rides in horse-drawn carriages, the top of the Eiffel Tower, a scavenger hunt that will take Matteo to the places that mean the most to the two of them. But nothing sparks David’s imagination.

David is stuck, and slowly he starts to despair. He can’t even propose to Matteo the way Matteo deserves.

He’s getting so frustrated that the whole wedding planning is getting on his nerves. He stopped showing off his ring, and the other day he cut off Matteo, who wanted to talk about maybe setting a date, or start making some decisions about what they wanna do. And he snapped at Laura for asking him if he wanted her to go with him to pick out his suit.

It's honestly becoming a huge deal, and David is panicking if he will ever find the perfect way. He needs to pop the question, so they can get hitched.

And now, for the past few weeks, he had been swamped with a new film project, and Matteo’s mom has been struggling so Matteo has been spending some late nights with her, and it just doesn’t seem the right timing to think about fitting in an elaborate, romantic gesture. And without David really noticing, weeks have passed and he’s still not any closer to his perfect proposal.

And then, David gets home late again, for the fourth day in a row. They are doing night filming, and everything is going wrong. The cast is grumpy, the props are not right, the crew keeps getting the technical stuff wrong, and the delays are endless. On top of that, today they were supposed to shoot the exterior scenes and it had been cold and rainy all evening. David is not just exhausted, but also hungry and wet and grumpy as fuck, and not looking forward to another week of night scenes.

He knows Matteo will be asleep already, having to wake up early to get to his job on time, too early for David to be ready to even have a cup of coffee with him, and so they will not see each other for a whole day again, and it’s eating at David.

He knows it is only a few hard weeks, and then things will get better again, but he hates it when this happens.

He always feels worse when he can’t share his day with Matteo. Somehow Matteo seems to bring out exactly what David needs: Matteo will calm him after a stressful day, inspire him when he is struggling to find a solution to a problem, energize him when he is feeling down and let him blow off steam when he is upset. Matteo will go with David for an adventure when David has too much energy, and cuddle him to death when David wants to be quiet.

The darkness in their flat upsets him even more, even though he knew it would be like this. But then he sees a light in the kitchen, and for a moment, his heart jumps up, hoping against hope Matteo will have waited up for him, so he can at least kiss him for a few minutes before Matteo needs to go to bed.

When he enters the kitchen, though, it is empty, and all the tiredness and crabbiness David feels, hits him again, but multiplied tenfold.

Out of the corner of his eye, he notices the big sheet of paper on the table. He groans. Matteo probably left him a grocery list, or some chores he wants David to do tomorrow before he leaves for the film set. David’s hand goes to the light switch, ready to turn it off and ignore the page completely. But then he feels bad all of a sudden. The long work hours on the set mean David has been slacking a bit on his chores recently, and Matteo hasn’t complained about the added load. He should at least see what Matteo wants.

 _Hey babe_ , he reads in Matteo chicken scrawl, _I made pasta alla Luigi for you, it’s in the fridge, just heat it up in the microwave._

David hears his stomach growl at the mention of pasta alla Luigi, and he takes the bowl out of the fridge to heat up as he reads on.

_Oh, and your shirt is ironed, it’s on top of the dresser. Best looking guy on the set should also be the best dressed. :)_

David smiles as the pasta is turning in the microwave. Typical Matteo, to casually drop a compliment like that. He continues while he takes the pasta out.

_Also…_

David takes a bite of the pasta. God, how can it always taste so good? The only thing that could make it taste any better was if Matteo was standing next to him, leaning into him, his head on David’s shoulder.

_Please don’t be mad at me, but…_

Uh-oh.

David drops the fork back into the bowl, and grabs the sheet with both hands.

_I just really miss you and I know you’re busy with filming and if you’re too tired that’s fine, but I took tomorrow off so we can spend some time together before you have to go to work. I’m sorry if you had plans and I don’t want to be too clingy but I’d just really like to actually spend some time with my hot fiancé. Love you!_

David rereads those few scrawled sentences, and he almost keens over when it hits him. Matteo is taking care of David in each and every way he can think off, cooking for him and handling the laundry and moving things around in his agenda to accommodate David’s, just so they can spend a few uninterrupted hours together. David almost forgets about the cold and the hunger and the irritation after the day he had. Once again, Matteo figured out exactly what David needs – Matteo – and provided it.

He has no idea what he ever did to deserve Matteo. Matteo’s love is endless, and David just gets to be here and bask in it.

He is so goddamn lucky that Matteo will be his husband soon. He wonders why he has been delaying the planning so much. They could have had a date set, arranged the festivities, sent out the invitations – and instead, he has been dithering and slowing things down. He has wasted months – months he will now have to wait longer to become Matteo’s husband.

And then he suddenly knows. He doesn’t need to go all out with his proposal, because that is not how he loves Matteo, or how Matteo loves him. Their love is not flashy and loud, it is quiet and slow and stable and strong and lasting.

And David knows exactly what he wants them to do together, tomorrow.

David forgets his hunger, and hurries to the bedroom, where Matteo is fast asleep, but since they now can lie in in the morning – for a little bit, at least – he gently shakes the blonde boy awake with a hand on his shoulder. Matteo warily opens his eyes, but his face softens and a smile appears when he sees David.

“Hey,” he mumbles, voice hoarse from sleep. “Did you find my note?”

“I did,” David whispers, quickly getting rid of his clothes and getting under the blankets, opening his arms for Matteo, who immediately molds himself against David.

“You don’t mind?”

David pulls Matteo closer, breathing in his earthy scent, relaxing with the warm weight of Matteo’s head on his chest.

“Of course not, you idiot. I love it. I love getting to spend some quality time with you. I love you.”

Matteo mumbles, pretty much back asleep already, “Love you too,” and David closes his eyes, excited for the next day.

***

“Come on, Teo!”

David tugs Matteo along by the hand, laughing giddily. He can’t wait to arrive.

“Where are we even going?”, Matteo asks, looking around. They don’t often come to this part of town, but David has been here before, quite recently even.

“You’ll see,” he exclaims, as they turn a corner and David stops in front of a fancy store.

Matteo looks at him, completely perplexed.

“Huh? What’s this?”

“Can’t you read?”, David teases, the excitement making him jittery.

Matteo stares at David as if he has lost his mind, but David opens the door and steps in, and Matteo follows along, looking around a bit apprehensively.

A salesperson in a suit comes forward.

“Good morning gentlemen,” she says, a welcoming smile on her face. “Can I help you with anything?”

David saunters up, grabbing Matteo by the hand.

“I hope you can,” he says lightly. “I’m David, and this is my fiancé, Matteo. We need wedding rings… and an engagement ring for him, too.”

Matteo whips his head towards David.

“What?”

David laughs, kissing Matteo full on the mouth.

“You remember that you proposed to me, right? That usually leads to a wedding, and weddings require wedding rings.”

Matteo just stares at David, and the saleslady looks at them with a fond smile.

“Congratulations, gentlemen! We do have a very nice selection of wedding rings, if you’ll follow me…”

“Wait a minute!”, Matteo says, grabbing David’s hand. “We haven’t even talked about the wedding yet, or set a date or anything. And what do you mean, an engagement ring for me?”

“It doesn’t matter when the wedding will be, baby. We can pick out our rings already today. And I told you I was gonna put a ring on your finger… I want everybody to know you’re mine.”

Matteo doesn’t move, and suddenly David worries he’s made a mistake.

“Unless you don’t want to choose our rings, yet, of course… I mean, we don’t have to…”

Matteo shakes his head vigorously.

“No, no, I do want to… I wanna start moving forward on this, set a date, start planning. But I thought… you seemed a bit… well, I thought you wanted to wait a little. And there is no rush, really…”

David grabs Matteo’s face between his hands.

“I didn’t want us to start planning the wedding before I could propose to you. But I had no clue how to do it, make it all romantic and everything, and then I didn’t know which ring you would like, so I didn’t do anything. But I realized I just wanna marry you, as soon as possible. So yeah, I thought we could get our wedding rings today. Get that first check mark on the list of things that need to be done.”

Matteo nods wordlessly, his eyes full of joy.

“Oh, and,” David adds, “you get to pick out your engagement ring while we’re here, too. But you can’t wear it just yet. I still have to propose.”

Matteo rolls his eyes at that, but he leans into David happily.

The saleslady is obviously slightly bewildered, but regains her professional attitude quickly.

“So, I was saying, if you could just follow me…”

***

Matteo has put the expensive wedding rings safely in the top drawer in their bedroom. They will have to take them back to get engraved with the date later if they want, but they both just really wanted to take them home with them. Matteo has opened the box when he thought David didn’t notice, before he hid it behind their socks, and David almost melted at the happy, dazed look on Matteo’s face. David has an inkling they both plan on putting them on later, admiring them, pretending to be married already. It might be silly to others, but to them, it is not. They want it to be clear they belong to each other, and those rings will be the most obvious sign of that.

David, however, has not let Matteo’s engagement ring out of his sight. He put it in his pocket as soon as they paid, and no amount of Matteo’s whining or pouting has placated him.

Now, Matteo is heating up the pasta alla Luigi – not in the microwave, though, that is for people who aren’t skilled in the culinary arts, like David – and David is waiting impatiently.

As soon as Matteo is done transferring the dish into two bowls, David grabs them and takes them to the couch. Matteo huffs out a laugh and follows. They cuddle up against each other, eating silently. After a few bites, David surreptitiously puts down his food, and takes the small box out of his pocket.

“Teo?”, he asks.

Matteo hums in response, his eyes on his fork, where a huge load of pasta balances precariously.

“Will you please marry me?”

The pasta drops off the fork and the fork clangs against the bowl.

Matteo looks over, and when he sees David sitting there, cross-legged on the sofa, holding out the ring, he starts laughing.

“Oh my god, you idiot,” he manages to get out, “ _this_ is how you wanna propose to me? You said you wanted it to be all romantic!”

David leans into Matteo.

“This is the most romantic setting I can imagine, though. The two of us together, eating your food, just being happy. This is the life I want to lead with you, Teo. This is how I want it to be until we are old and grey and have to stop eating pasta because we have no teeth anymore. This is how I want our marriage to be, us enjoying every minute we are together. I don’t need grand flashy gestures. I just need you. So what is your answer, babe? Will you?”

Matteo looks at him, and his eyes well up just a bit as he nods.

“Yes. Yes, I will marry you, you idiot. Now put that ring on my finger, please.”

“Oooh, already being demanding, I see,” David remarks sarcastically, but he does as requested. He has wanted to do this for months, after all. The feeling he gets when he sees the ring sitting proudly on Matteo’s finger, is almost better than the one he got when Matteo did the same to him.

“Well, yeah,” Matteo replies, his tone teasing, but his throat slightly constricted with bliss. “I want to finally be properly engaged to you. That, and the pasta is getting cold.”

And they collapse against each other in a fit of hysterical laughter, and then they try to kiss each other, but they are laughing so much they just can’t, and David just sees them exactly like this in sixty years, and it is the most wonderful thing he could ever imagine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally! Now the wedding planning can start... Kiki will be happy. :)
> 
> Please feel free to point out any errors, I did rush the editing a bit, sorry about that!
> 
> And you know what? I love comments even more than I love chocolate. Just saying. ;)
> 
> <3

**Author's Note:**

> Please feel free to point out any errors!
> 
> And, if you'd like, leave a comment. They mean so much.
> 
> <3


End file.
